It’s such a comfort, talking to you. Knowing you have dreams and goals, loving every tiny detail of that life you’re going to lead. While I look at you, I see myself as I would like to be. Unsure, frightened, but ultimately brave. Things I can’t tell you in person, I’ll write it now. I like the way you look sideways when you try to hide that you’re thinking. I like the way you catch me by surprise when you look into my eyes far longer than I’m used to. I hate that I can’t sustain it, that I look away because I feel unreasonably, inexplicably vulnerable. As if by looking into my eyes for more than 5 seconds you’d know the depth of how I feel.
I live knowing that I’ll never fully understand what it is you’re thinking. I’m content with not knowing. Oftentimes I catch myself in mourning. I know you’re leaving. Sweet, sweet sorrow. I’m happy you’ve found the courage to pursue your ideas. Ideas I’m sure you’ll be able to make into reality. And he’s right. You will always have the option of coming back. You’ll always have your family and friends back home. Your desire to make a mark in this world is admirable and truthful. Never hold yourself back from what you feel you’re destined to achieve. You told me the value of hard work. And because of that belief, I know you can make things happen for you.
I miss you even now. I miss you when I’m with you. I think I always will. You’re my friend and I love you so much. I haven’t thanked you enough for being who you are and trying as much as you did. For meeting me halfway in everything that has happened so far. It was far from perfect, I know. But I’m glad we’re here. I can only express how much I miss you when I cry, hearing a song that tells me it’s going to be okay for you and me. No matter what, you are part of my heart. You have loved my friends. You encourage my life.