Twelve Minutes to Six

Dear Self,

How are you? You feel very overwhelmed right now. But there have been so many brilliant, heart-breaking moments. It’s the feeling you get when witnessing a rare and glorious sight: It’s powerful, breathtaking and wonderful. I feel so happy to have been witness to many things that has happened to me, my friends and family. And even now, I feel so sad, realizing that you’re far from where I am, where we once were. I miss you so much. I don’t miss how we were. I miss you. If I’m to be honest, I miss you.

Detangling onself from someone is a long and painful process. But it is a process I will go through with dignity. It is a quiet, violent and sad state at any moment. I don’t know what will happen to me. I don’t know what will happen to you. But right now, I miss you. I miss you. I miss you.

That’s what happens when you let yourself care so deeply about someone. When you let them go, you let a part of yourself go. It’s true that we’re never the same because of people we love. That’s why we suffer so much when they leave our lives… You can’t have someone change the way you’ve lived if you didn’t let them in so deeply in the first place.

Ah well. Twelve minutes to six.

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